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tasty-pirate.org

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about lawnpig
all-time favorite search requests
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shout out to:
greymatter

 

 

December 25, 2004 @ 02:13:32 AM

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Ho, ho, ho! Merry ass-fucking!

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Do you listen to his "12 Days of Christmas" on 8-track?

wav Santa -Lampoon -Vacation -story -songs -midi -midis
The people at the video store gave us National Lampoon's Holiday Reunion instead of Napolean Dynamite, and it almost ruined Christmas.

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When you say "helpers", are you talking about the elves or the department store Santas?

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They aren't looking for clubs in the Southwest, just hot Santa gayness.

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That's no way to honor the birth of Jesus.

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Are the cheerleaders nude, too, or... ?

"children's letters to Santa" *
My favorite thing about Christmas. Seriously. Well, those and eating fudge.

eggnog as lesbian slang *
Really? I'll be taking your word about that, searcher.

There once was a snowman named Joe *
He was born of the fresh Christmas snow.

"hear all the bells" *
"... the bells, bells, bells, bells-
Bells, bells, bells-
To the moaning and the groaning of the bells."

Merry Christmas, those of you who celebrate it! (If you don't, have a bitchin' Saturday.)

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December 24, 2004 @ 02:08:32 PM

Dear Santa,

Hi! How are the reindeer? Do you like cookies? Do you lick Rudolph?

Please send Jim-Bob to (Adult-Baby Summer camp) this year. He almost killed himself last year when he couldn't afford it. He'd also love some tampon kinky wear. There's nothing kinkier than people who wear tampons!

Bill is dying for a real beer can party, a beer can island party nude. No kegs or clothes for him, Santa!

Enos wants nothing more than fetish gallery girl ass fucked then sucks shit covered cock. That sounds icky to me, Santa, but who are we to judge?

Joe-Bob said he wants "Olsen Twins" and "virgins" and "love waits. That's a lot of stuff, so I hope you can make room on your sleigh.

Kelly loves Nascar and stories where the drivers have gay sex, so please bring her some kyle busch fan fic slash.

Mom is trying to break up the neighbors, so, if you would, Santa, leave some pictures of the neighbors wife fucking you in her stocking. Then she can show them to Mr. Westfield and he'll never forgive that cheating slut!

Bort would love some nude barrel butted girls. I'm not talking about pictures, Santa! Provide the actual women.

As for me, Santa? I want some weaver popcorn mighty pop. * Also, Hulk Hands. I'm so much less perverted than the rest of the family.

Love,
Corey

P.S. Pictures of gay santa fucking little boys on christmas! All I really want for Christmas is for porn sites to stop copying pages from my web site to attract hits. The least they could do is give me a link back, Santa!

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December 12, 2004 @ 04:51:24 PM

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I recommend hot sauce.

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None of that funny stuff. Just a good, clean, naked food-fight.

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That's so hot. Also, realistic.

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Eating hot dogs.

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Really? Mostly, I just want to pick the bugs off my skin.

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Cock story appreciates your honesty.

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That's kind of tragic, really.

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Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Real Monsters!

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Does she need it to purchase a bidet?

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Google suggests you try: "stepmother fucking with here sun show free photos"
Oh, Google. You always make sense of everything.

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I'm wearing mine to a job interview!

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Because people search this. (And look through 156+ results.)

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I bet the ads for those cigarettes have sexual undertones.

Comment Posted Before I Disallowed Comments:

celia on 12-05-2004 @ 03:54 PM CDT says: "theyre not that bad...............

...... WAT DID THE THEY DO?......
do u reli hav 2 say thes stuf???"
(This person searched marykate olsen's songs. Those sound fantastic.)

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December 10, 2004 @ 07:28:38 PM

The unbelievable amount of comment spam has - and this really saddens me - forced me to turn off commenting. As much as I enjoy comments, I hate having to delete 50 spam posts a day more.

Actual search requests to come shortly.

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December 03, 2004 @ 07:15:05 PM

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This hit is one of my favorites now.

Jaleel White in her panties and bra
Clearly, this person has only seen the episodes involving Myrtle Urkel.

i want to fuck my brother so i see his hard cock mother .kiss lips ass anall
"And that's why you're going to therapy, dear."

caned seafood displays
I can't imagine that's the recommended way to prepare seafood.

Not just for kids!Thanksgiving coloring pichers
I colored a reindeer for Christmas. It's on the fridge now.

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1. View picture.
2. Enjoy!

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It will make the child seem wise beyond his years.

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Well, he pitches...

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Google loves it when you confusingly beg.

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How can I give you advice on why someone does something?

Ed Mcmahon Absolutely Correct
He was right - Johnny Carson was correct.

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Oh, no! They're old now!

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That's great.

"should i SWALLOW" -pride
To a certain extent, I think it does involve swallowing your pride.

Computer Games and Hypersomnia *
... together at last!

New Free Mike Piazza's Crotch
As opposed to the New, Costly Mike Piazza's Crotch. (Or the Old, Free Mike Piazza's Crotch. Etc.)

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Check out Big Red Chicken on Dora the Explorer.

how would Joel Madden fuck you?
He wouldn't.

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