Setting: (A half-assed barricade on some street in Paris. The well-hung young studs from the cafe are drinking copious amounts of liquor as the sexy National Guard approaches in their tight uniforms.)
Hot National Guard Dude: (Through bullhorn.) You're surrounded! You'll never escape my men!
Enjolras: (Climbs the barricade.) But I'm so passionate!
Hot National Guard Dude: We were going to kill you and be done with it, but we're prepared to offer a deal.
Enjolras: Killer.
Hot National Guard Dude: If you and your group of strapping young ruffians can orally pleasure me and all six hundred of my men before midnight, we'll let you go.
Enjolras: (To the students.) Do you think we're up to the challenge, boys?
Joly: (Checks out the asses on some of those National Guard hotties.) "Up" is definitely the word for it.
Enjolras: (To the National Guard.) I never could resist six hundred men in uniform.
(Massive orgy begins. A saxophone is heard. Gavroche dies. At the stroke of midnight, Enjolras miraculously finishes blowing the final National Guard.)
Enjolras: (To his exhausted comrades.) You know, I'm starting to think this system ain't half bad.